When God Says No

Recently, an unexpected job opportunity came into my life.

And honestly, it seemed almost tailor-made for me.

It was with a nonprofit ministry doing work I deeply care about. It would allow me to use my strengths, offered flexibility, and even gave me the opportunity to help shape what the role could become.

I was excited.

My husband thought it sounded great. My friends told me it seemed made for me.

On paper, there were a hundred reasons to say yes.

But there was this tiny part of me that couldn't quite get there.

Maybe 1%.

Nothing was wrong. There were no red flags. The door was wide open.

There was just something unsettled.

And the hardest part?

I wanted the answer to be yes.

When a Good Thing Isn't God's Thing

So I prayed.

I asked God for clarity. I asked Him to show me what to do. I kept waiting for the peace I thought would eventually come.

But it didn't.

For a while, I felt like God wasn't answering me.

Until I began to realize that maybe He was answering.

Maybe I just didn't like the answer.

I think sometimes we assume God's no will be obvious.

The door will close. The opportunity will disappear. The circumstances will change. Something will happen that makes the decision for us.

But sometimes the door stays wide open.

And that can make God's no much harder to understand.

Because this was a good opportunity.

It would serve me well.

It would provide additional income for our family.

It would serve a ministry doing important work.

It would allow me to use gifts God had given me.

There was nothing wrong with it.

But eventually, I realized that saying yes to this good thing wouldn't best serve something God had already entrusted to me in this season: my family.

And I began to understand something I'm still learning:

Not every good thing is God's good thing for me right now.

Is God Still Kind When the Answer Is No?

Psalm 145:17–18 says:

“The LORD is righteous in all his ways and kind in all his works. The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.”

I've been sitting with one word from those verses:

Kind.

God is kind in all His works.

I find it pretty easy to recognize God's kindness when His answer is yes.

When the prayer is answered.

When the opportunity comes.

When the door opens.

When the thing we've hoped for finally happens.

We say, God is so good.

And He is.

But what about when the answer is no?

Is He still good then?

Is He still kind when He asks us to release something we really wanted?

Psalm 145 tells us He is.

His kindness isn't determined by whether I understand His answer.

His character doesn't change because His answer wasn't the one I wanted.

Maybe No Isn't Withholding

I think it's easy to experience God's no as withholding.

Why wouldn't You let me have this?

Why would You bring this opportunity so close and then ask me to walk away?

Why not this, God?

But those questions assume I can see everything God sees.

I can't.

I can see what's directly in front of me.

God sees what saying yes will require six months from now.

He sees the needs I don't know are coming.

He sees the things already entrusted to me that might quietly suffer under the weight of one more yes.

He sees opportunities I don't even know exist yet.

Sometimes God's no isn't protection from something bad. Sometimes it's protection of something more important.

And perhaps that's why trusting God's no requires us to know God's character.

If I believe God is withholding good from me, I'll fight His no.

But if I believe He is righteous in all His ways and kind in all His works, I can begin to trust that there may be kindness hidden inside an answer I wouldn't have chosen.

When We Don't Understand

There's a simple prayer in 2 Chronicles 20:12 that feels especially fitting here:

“We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you.”

There will be decisions where we don't know what to do.

There will be answers from God we don't understand.

There will be doors we desperately want to walk through.

And maybe faith isn't always receiving an explanation.

Maybe sometimes faith looks like knowing enough about who God is that we can trust Him without one.

We keep our eyes on Him.

Not because we understand.

But because we know Him.

What Are You Asking God For?

Maybe there's something you've been bringing before God lately.

Something you really want.

Maybe it's an opportunity.

A relationship.

A change.

A dream you've carried for years.

A door you're hoping He'll open.

Philippians 4:6 tells us:

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.”

So tell Him.

Ask boldly.

Tell Him exactly what you hope for.

But then leave room for Him to be God.

Leave room for yes.

Leave room for wait.

And leave room for no.

Because prayer isn't about convincing God to give us what we've decided is good.

It's trusting that He knows what is good even when we cannot see it yet.

An Invitation

This month, instead of only asking God for the answer you want, spend some time remembering who He is.

When you're struggling with His answer, return to His character.

He is righteous in all His ways.

He is kind in all His works.

He is near to those who call on Him.

Maybe you don't understand His no yet.

Maybe you never will.

But faith doesn't always require understanding.

Sometimes it simply requires remembering.

God's no does not make Him less generous.

His silence does not make Him less near.

His answer does not change His character.

He is still good.

He is still kind.

And He can still be trusted.

A Prayer for Trust

Father,

Thank You that Your character does not change with Your answers. You are good when You say yes. You are good when You ask me to wait. And You are good when You say no.

Help me bring my desires honestly before You without believing that I know what is best. When I don't understand what You are doing, remind me of who You are.

You see what I cannot see. You know what I do not know. You are righteous in all Your ways and kind in all Your works.

When I am tempted to believe You are withholding something good from me, remind me of Your faithfulness. When I don't know what to do, help me keep my eyes on You. Give me faith to trust Your heart even when I don't understand Your hand. And help me believe that even in the no, You are still near.

Still good. Still kind. Still worthy of my trust.

Amen.